The Yellow Umbrella

910-547-3093

4014 Oleander Drive Suite 103 Building D
Wilmington, NC 28403

Emotionally Focused
Couple's Therapy

Emotionally Focused Couple's Therapy

Emotionally Focused Couple's Therapy

Type of Therapy:

Emotive

Description:

EFT therapy proposes that we are biologically wired and evolutionarily designed to seek out a partner to help hold us and protect us through the storms of life. We seek contact and comfort, and our need to depend on one precious other never disappears, no matter how old we get. The core of happy relationships is deep trust where partners know they matter to each other and will be available and responsive to each other when needed.

EFT teaches that most relationship distress comes from the fear that emotional connection with our partner is vanishing, that our source of comfort and respite is unavailable. The partner is no longer an emotional safe haven, and the partnership feels “insecure.” This insecurity generates intense anxiety that causes the couple to fall into rigid patterns of conflict and disagreement.

Sequences of conflict are like a dance in which each partner knows only one step. Typically, one partner tries to withdraw while the other pursues attention relentlessly and often angrily. Each does what they know to do to preserve the relationship, but they unwittingly feed the toxic cycle operating between them.

To help the couple find happiness, EFT works to shore up the cracking foundation of the relationship by helping the couple build a more secure emotional connection. The key to restoring connection is, first, interrupting and dismantling the destructive dance sequences. Then, the therapist helps the couple construct a more emotionally open and receptive way of interacting. As the couple experiences together their mutual fears, longings, and vulnerability, each tends to feel a growing empathy for the other.

Facts & Figures:

The hard work of restoring connection is worth it. Research studies show that close connection is the strongest predictor of happiness. It significantly lessens susceptibility to anxiety and depression and makes us more resilient against illness, stress, and trauma. Rigorous studies and surveys even show that sexual satisfaction and excitement for both men and women increase with emotional commitment and sexual exclusivity.

The results of EFT therapy have proven better than the outcomes of any other model of couple’s therapy. 70% of couples who complete EFT treatment experience a significant improvement in their relationship, and the results endure over time.

EFT Successfully Treats:

Most issues in troubled relationships except for substance abuse and domestic violence.

"Love doesn't just sit there, like a stone, it has to be made, like bread; remade all the time, made new."

--Ursula K Le Guin